مائة يوم ويوم

Things you learn in 101 days living in the UK.

1. There's no place like home.
2. A7la banat, banat il deerah.
3. Not even 2 out of 98 British girls are attractive.
4. Opening a bank account isn't worth the money (?).
5. 8mb internet connection is a life-saver.
6. You can get a degree without stepping foot in the library.
7. Buses aren't all that.
8. Only 1 out of 37 cars is worth noticing in the UK.
   
9. You can almost say 'cheers' in response to anything.
10. Don't ever say cheers, say 'chairz' with just a hint of the /r/
11. Always finish with a tag question. "iz no' like amma finish the blady asay in a week, now iz i`?"
12. Everybody sounds better than British peeps, they all have pathetic voices.
13. But then again everybody sounds better with a british accent
    
14. They take their lunch-breaks seriously here.
15. They take sandwiches seriously, sheghel toast emgasas into triangles.
16. They take chips even more seriously. PaKiTaKRiSPs <--
17. You still wouldn't know why they laugh on something that's not funny, not in 101 days.
18. British chicks will check you out on a regular basis if you're not RED and BLONDE.
19. Mondays are the worst since it's the loudest before lectures. Probably because everyone got laid over the weekend.
20. Over the weekend, you can tell exactly what the score of a football match is if you count the "YEAAAHH"s coming from the stadium near your apartment.
21. You can tell how many times someone almost scored if you count the "OooooooHHHHHHHHH"s.
22. And you can also tell how many "nice plays" there were if you count the applause.
    
23. I3yal el engelaiz wayed wayed waaaayed id3al.
    
24. You learn the importance of filters for running drinking water.
25. You learn that it takes 15 minutes to organize a living room.
26. And only 1 minute to mess it all over again.
27. You can't learn to call a professor by his or her first name. You're programmed to say Dr first, no matter how much they insist.
    
28. The Kuwaiti embassy sucks.
29. You know that on one of the next 101 days, shakly ra7 a6eg the chinese delivery guy.
    
30. There is NO SUBSTITUTE for: jeben abyath, khyar o 6oma6 imgasas weya khobz lebnani/irani.
31. The Arab guys hate you once they know you're Kuwaiti. You refrain from resorting to violence.
32. Your Kuwaiti casual wardrobe puts even models to shame.
33. The British let alllll this rain go to waste. Ma yesta3rethon b parking lots.
34. Internet shopping is fun since shipping isn't a bitch and fast.
35. Temetwir + school work = 8mb connection + downloads, instead.
36. Being asked out for coffee shouldn't be responded to by "Yaaaa.. I don't think so".
37. Nor by "Yaaaaa.. am not too big on coffee"
38. Everyone in the UK is tall. Even the kids.
39. There are more babies in trollies, than there are mothers (?)
40. You get the idea that babies are made, you rarely see fathers. Only mothers. But then again you see more babies than mothers (??)
41. You get a clearer perspective as to what you want to do with your life here. Somehow. Madri.
42. You still don't get a hang of the etiquette involved when the couple in line infront of you are kissing. But you almost always say "chairz" when they say "sorry".
43. A moment when an English baby is slapped by his MuMMy is a moment of joy for you.
44. You reallllly start to like the older crowd. Senior citizens are the shit!
45. You keep quiet on an average of 22hrs a day. As opposed to the 9hrs back in Kuwait. That's a lot of not saying anything.
46. Never answer the phone when caller ID says "Out of area" if you're not expecting family.
47. After 101 days, you get the hang of deals and you start to appreciate the "2 for 1" offers at M&S.
48. You becomes your best friend.
49. Thoughts of your family keep you going.
50. The UK is gay.