Temetwir

30.4.06

How to maintain 0% productivity

Some say it's a skill, some say it's an art, psychologists and science say it's a disorder. I say you're either born with it or you're not. Regardless of what it is.



-
Make lists like this one
- Take an interest in something like .. internal affairs of Australia
- Read the news
- Then go read the same news, in another paper
- Go find a translated version of the same news
- Check out really old emails you still have in the inbox
- By the way, watch the news too
- Organize your downloaded pictures into folders
- Then, if for example you have cars in a folder & bikes in another, sort by name
- Then, sort by color
- Then sort by modded or not modded
- Make a list of mods for your ride(s)
- Vow to 'not work until I can do 3 sets of 60 pushups'
- If and when you do that, tell yourself that, since you managed, you should treat yourself to some icecream - mind you, only if it means you need to go get some
- Read the latest news while eating the icecream
- Edit your bookmarks/favorites
- Download masra7eyaat from nuks.org
- Better yet, itha SIJ you want 0% productivity, download drama series
- Read about scheduled movies
- Look up old movies of not-so-known actors
- Try to learn all you can about the history of OPEC and its decisions
- Get a pile of clothes and try them on
- Think about what you REALLY want to name your children
- Talk to someone about internal affairs of Australia from above
- Ask a friend for his opinion on the latest news from above
- Start a thread on a forum talking about old movies for not-so-known actors
- Make 5-year and 10-year plans using nothing but Notepad and Calculator on the PC
- Check for used car prices in two countries and compare the 2nd-hand market
- Talk with a friend about a girl you played
- Shave using a shaving machine only
- Go back an hour later and use a blade 7ag ta7deedat il shanab wel le7ya
- Talk to friends about other friends you haven't seen for a while and see how they're doing
- Play Tetris and don't stop until you beat the highest score you already have set. This is genius.
- Check for updates on the internal affairs of Australia



25 Comments:

  • Brilliant! As if we follow the same code.

    How about ::
    - Reorder room
    - Re-sort clothes to colors, monasabat & most preferred articles
    - Water ALL the plants in the house. Even dead ones.
    - Watch plants after watering them, for the hope of seeing actual growth.
    - Change dead light bulbs. In rooms you've never been to, too.
    - Keep email open waiting for latest Blog post replies.

    I'll save the rest to other contributors to allow them to produce even more of nothing.

    By Blogger MBH, at 30.4.06  

  • very nice list...how come i know alot of that list?? maybe i did a few of them :P lol...

    guess i aint a productive person :P

    By Blogger SpiKeY, at 30.4.06  

  • that is the funniest thing I've read in a long while, thanks for the post.

    By Blogger teagirl, at 1.5.06  

  • wahahahahahahahaha great post :D

    thank God i haven't done any of the points on the list... well, except for the tetris one, that happned :p


    hey! i was really bored!

    By Blogger Ms. Sarah, at 1.5.06  

  • mbh
    pretty good ones to keep in mind for kuwait ..
    loved the light bulbs, especially if it means u have to go get some

    spikey
    unproductivity is a WAY OF LIFE .. yeaaaah baby

    photoflow
    im glad, ur most welcome :)

    swair
    chairz
    and, what a NERD !! none of those?
    u must be like .. the obe one kenobe (sp?) of studies

    By Blogger Temetwir, at 1.5.06  

  • loooooooooooool..... hathy 7alty bil thabt..... hate studying for exams besides im being unproductive these days which freaks me out..... so besides surfing the net every half an hour after reading five or six pages on John Major government (which is so boring) to reward myself.... i constantly eat have a nap.... or even start cleaning the apartment (to be honest i know its weird but time passes really fast)..... when im really desparate i start checking my passport to make sure its valid and my ticket or even call Gulf Air to make sure that i have a reservation and i do book a seat too-after looking for the seating configuration in the net- at the end of the day i end up reading only 20 pages :)

    By Blogger متفرغ, at 1.5.06  

  • how abt:

    1. watchin clouds move in the sky.
    2. watch old sit-coms reruns.
    3. plan a diet ;p
    4.eat wutever ur hand reaches.

    By Blogger jiji, at 1.5.06  

  • metfarigh
    u guys who "study for exams" HAVE IT GOOD mate.. i wish that was the case with my bloody degree, i really do becoz i have a tendency to 'understand and pick up' from the lectures, so 'studying' for me is basically revision ..
    but writing essays? that BS kills u on the inside heheh

    loved the checking passport fo validity, 3ajeeba

    jiji
    the watching of old sitcoms can work pretty easily .. i do it with the movies i have on the laptop hehe

    By Blogger Temetwir, at 1.5.06  

  • lol
    If time is money, then who'll do all the above (including comments) is a Zillionaire!

    what about:
    - check food expiry dates.
    - Analyze how smart G.Bush sounds, then find a way to describe his genius-ness. (your health insurance doesn’t cover side symptoms).
    - Think about the best way to be productive (research, statics, studies and surveys are essential here).
    - Set a new blog dedicated to find the best way to productivity.
    - check the blog's template, does it look productive?
    - think about the time you spent doing all the above, and if you can't see any productivity init, start over.

    By Blogger iDip, at 1.5.06  

  • idip
    THATS the idea,, when u dont have the time u MAKE it to do 'nothing productive' .. sweeeet
    hmmm, analyze how smart Bush sounds .. i like

    laialy
    100 bucks says YOU CANT TOUCH THIS .. i will either send the tetris game i have to u or u send me the one u have..
    100 bucks, paypal is ur friend
    IN?

    By Blogger Temetwir, at 1.5.06  

  • - Organize books by letters than reorganize them by colours.

    - Watch Oprah.

    By Blogger True Faith, at 1.5.06  

  • Play Tetris and don't stop until you beat the highest score you already have set. This is genius.

    I already do that ._.

    -Saph, who's not addicted, really!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1.5.06  

  • true faith
    if only i read ;p

    sapphire
    im willing to bet that tetris was invented by a bored student

    laialy
    i sent to ur gmail account, but i just recieved a failure notification .. so i took a wild guess n sent to a hotmail one, same thing

    By Blogger Temetwir, at 1.5.06  

  • Making lists and not sticking to them is just great :D
    some of the nothingness you mentioned is very something! like trying clothes on, think of it this way, the nicer your clothes are the more society will be open to you, the more society will be open to you, the more you'll contribute, so technically, you're trying on clothes/buying new ones is a selfless act :D :D

    By Blogger Faith, at 1.5.06  

  • faith
    that doesn't make sense on so many levels, that now i can sympathize with why some MPs are calling for 30 circles even instead of the current 25 or proposed 5

    at any rate, buy more clothes 3alaich bel3afya hehe

    By Blogger Temetwir, at 1.5.06  

  • Tem:

    It was actually created by this crazy Russian guy who after having the copyrights for the game snatched from him committed suicide in a bathroom, drawing random tetris shapes on the bathroom tiles before he died wih his blood.

    And how do I know this? By looking up random useless stuff on the internet instead of studying.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1.5.06  

  • sapphire
    .. damn, that's cold

    but entirely false:

    his name is: Alexey Pazhitnov
    yes, russian, and " As of 2004, he is part of the Microsoft's Zone Group, which creates games for MSN."

    credible source

    regardless, u gotta love the 'intarntaz'

    By Blogger Temetwir, at 1.5.06  

  • It's sickening to read a list like that. Bah.
    Gotta go be productive. I kid you not.

    By Blogger Safi, at 2.5.06  

  • You don't drink coffee and you don't read !!!

    May God help you :P

    By Blogger True Faith, at 2.5.06  

  • You mean I've been wasting my time not studying by looking up FALSE information? D:

    Woe.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2.5.06  

  • laialy
    contacted

    safi
    its all abt pragmatism
    fuck unrealized effort

    true faith
    heh now that u say it, i realize how un-typical it 'may seem'

    sapphire
    allah yhadeech lo gayla 'he commited suicide' chan okay, but the bathroom tiles? tetris blocks? dying in his own blood?
    lets not get carried away now heh

    By Blogger Temetwir, at 2.5.06  

  • un-typical is good :)

    By Blogger True Faith, at 2.5.06  

  • Wow! That must mean I'm 90% productive! Thanx Teme!

    By Blogger Hazolat, at 3.5.06  

  • Unrealized effort? Life is full of that. Things you do that go unappreciated. You just gotta live with that and learn from it.
    You live, you learn.

    By Blogger Safi, at 3.5.06  

  • aha.. ? and what do u learn exactly?

    point being: what u learn, from experience with unrealized effort, is how to maintain a higher rate of ensuring that effort is indeed realized

    otherwise, itd be a waste of time and .. uh,, effort

    u dont just live with it and 'accept it' going on doing the same things that yield no consequence .. that's called 'fucking up'

    By Blogger Temetwir, at 3.5.06  

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